fallen
by volleyball30
Summary: jasper hale is a fallen angel along with edward bella emmett rosalie and his sweet heart Alice and they want to bring him to the relm instead of staying in the real world and hurting himself. but the only thing thats stopping him is his sister with cancer
1. Chapter 1

One, long slice. I felt the burning, the stinging. The feeling of the pain that was built up inside of me. I feel my wings spread, I quickly put them back. I press my pointer finger hard on the slice that started bleeding on my wrist. I smell the blood and lick a drop of it before it drips to the crème colored carpet. I feel it trickle down my throat. I lick my pointer finger free from my pained blood. I make another clean, precise cut, close my eyes, and breathe the clean air, the smell of sweet, rusty blood overwhelming it. Taking up the happy space, that was then filled with the smell of a troubled soul's blood. My wings try to break free, but I smash them back in.

I lick my wounds, cleaning out the blood. I then put the blade safely away, get up, grab a purple bandana, and wrap it around my two cuts. I get up and put on my black ray-bands. I study myself in the mirror. Then I close my eyes, when I open them, I am deep in the forest. The only place where I know I can be safe. Safe from the tears, the names, the kicking, the screaming, the fighting.

The weeping willow trees surrounded the small wide area of perfectly dark green grass. With shrubs, purple flowers, and rose bushes. I look up and see the dark clouds hovering over the empty space above. The air had a small current of icy air, that flowed through my hair. It sent goose-bumps down my arms. I rub my right arm with my left hand. I was happy when I then saw my only love, the one who can always make me happy. The one who takes me off the blade, pulls me away from the blood- Alice.

"Jasper." She whispers, he wings spread out behind her.

"Alice." I whisper back, taking her hand in mine. Her deep golden eyes, staring into my safe soul, the un-troubled soul. Her eyes supported by heavy, black, full-length lashes. Her petite, tiny figure looked up at me.

"How have you been?" She asks, laying her head on my chest, as we fall back to the soft, grassy ground.

"You know I could be better." I say, rubbing the small of her tiny back. She then grabs my wrist, the one with the bandana. She smells it, then a low rumble comes through her throat.

"Jasper." She says firmly, through her teeth.

"I'm sorry. I can't stop." I whisper. She knows how to take me away from the blade for a few days, but soon enough I am back to it.

"You know you can." Alice says, her wings spreading over us.

"Sometimes, I can't." I say, tightening my grip.

"Lets not talk about this." She says, closing her eyes.

"Where are Edward, Bella, Rosalie, and Emmett?" I ask.

"I don't know, somewhere." She shrugs, closing her eyes, and taking a smell of the crisp air. I close my eyes, wishing I could be a better person, a person away from the real life drama. The sightings I have to see each day, the things I have to go through each day. My heart ripped by a black hole. My pained soul, seeking a way out, slipping away from life each day. Turning worse and worse, with no hope in turning better. Screaming for help, aching to be fixed. Alice being my band-aid, a band-aid because band-aids only help half the problem. They cover the wound up just for a little, not letting any bacteria getting it, when there are cracks that the bacteria can still slip through. Still, band-aids help just the slightest.

"I can help you Jasper." Alice says, as I open my eyes to see her staring into my eyes.

"No one can." I say, looking away from he strong, intense gaze that she started to hold on me.

"You can leave the pain, you can come with me, to the place where we can be happy. With no interruptions, away from the pain and sorrow ness." She explains.

"Yes, but you can still come back here, to reality Alice, and I don't want any part of reality." I say.

"All of our friends have left. Edward, Rosalie, Emmett, even Bella."

"Yes, but they still come back here, they have no choice. We would have no choice but to come back every once and a while." I argue.

"They choose to come back, because if they didn't, they would leave us behind. They come back because they have left back two things that they are close to, that they love." Alice says, her small pointy voice, soothing my pain, only enough for her voice to end.

"I would be leaving behind things too Alice." I say, in a low, small voice.

"And that would be?" She asks.

"My little sister, Samantha." I say quietly.

"Jasper, she isn't your blood sister."

"She still means the world to me." I say. Alice means the galaxy to me, and Alice understands what I meant by the world.

"Jasper, the world outside of reality will be so, better. We will fade away from the pain, the tears, everything."

"I can't leave Samantha."

"Please Jasper, I can't stand to keep seeing you in pain. And you know I can't live without you."

"Then don't Alice, come back, visit me."

"No, once I'm gone, I don't want to come back to this damn relm."

"Alice-" I breathe.

"I understand how much Samantha means to you, I truly do, it just pains me to see you like this." She says, lifting up my cut wrist. I pull it away. I then stand up, leaving her on the ground.

"I will see you later." Then I am in my car. I felt bad leaving Alice alone, I just didn't want to hear the conversation. I didn't want to leave Samantha. She was my only happy thing, besides Alice. _It's hard to choose between a sister and a love. _I thought to myself. I rest my head on the steering wheel. Then there was a knock on my window. I look up, it was Edward. I roll down the self-turn window.

"Yes?" I ask, staring hard into his almond shaped emerald green eyes. His bronze hair was styled in his usual messy bufont.

"Samantha is in the hospital." He whispers. I then exactly knew why Samantha would be in hospital. Her cancer. It was getting worse. She was only nine years old. She was seven when she was diagnosed. A lump in my throat tightened, and I could feel my eyebrows crease in. A prickly feeling started picking at the back of my eyes. My stomach tightened and turned.

"Everyone is there with her." Edward said, staring at my shrunken face.

"Get in." I barely whisper. A second later, Edward was next to me in the car, already buckled in. I slowly pulled my sealt-bealt around me, and clipped it in. I put the keys in the ignition, and started the car. Seconds later, we were moving off the driveway, and headed to the hospital.


	2. Chapter 2

Edward was tense in the seat next to me. His arms were stiff at his side. What we were, were so mortifying. At least to me it was. We were fallen angels, all of us; Edward, Bella, Alice, Rosalie, Emmett, and I. The only place where we could escape away from the mortal world, the reality of everyone's pain, was our kind's relm. We could sense how people were feeling, we could see what they were going through, without _actually _seeing it. If they were happy, sad, pained, scared, frightened, we could tell, we would know everything they were going through, and how they were feeling with one look at them.

I studied myself in the rear-view mirror. Only a glimpse I did, and I remembered every feature on my face. My brown eyebrows were still creased in, my forehead was crumpled in pain. My hazel blue eyes were filled with worry, and silent tears. My blonde hair was styled fine, the only calm part about myself at that time. My pink lips were turned down at the sides in a worried frown. I put my gaze back on the road. I knew what was going on with Samantha. She was dying, the cancer was taking her life away one day at a time. Filling her with pain and struggle to stay alive, even though she was dying. Her poor, delicate body, getting weaker and skinnier as each day passes by. Getting paler, and paler, softer, and softer. I wanted to make it all go away, for her to be healthy, to stop seeing her face filled with struggle and hope that meant nothing.

"It's going to be okay." Edward suddenly said, looking at me.

"No it won't." I whisper.

"Don't give up on her so easily Jasper. She has a chance-"

"No Edward, she is _dying. _She will be _dead _soon, away from me, away from her family, from her life she could be living without cancer. Instead her life is slipping away, like sand slips between fingers. Her time is running out, leaving the Earth."

"I know how hard this is for you Jasper, just please don't give up." He pleaded.

"I already am starting to give up Edward." I say, turning on the radio, not wanting to talk anymore. Marvelous Things by Eislely started blaring out of the speakers. The song helped nothing, but it stopped Edward from talking, and that is all I wanted. I gripped the steering wheel, my pale skin turning completely white as my skin stretched over my knuckles, tighter and tighter. I stopped the car at a red light and took a deep breath in. I changed the radio station. In The End by Linkin Park turned on. As I listened to the lyrics, quickly hearing out the meaning of each individual word, tears started seeping out from my eyes, spilling over my cheeks, falling from my chin, landing on my jeans.

"You can go now." Edward whispered. I looked up from the middle of the steering wheel and looked at the green light. I pushed down on the gas. We turned into the hospital's parking lot. Slowing the car down, not wanting to leave the car and see Samantha's helpless body. I pulled into a parking place and turned the car off, not letting go of the steering wheel. I felt Edward's hand on my shoulder.

"Come on Jasper." He says in a soft tone. I nod and open my door. I lock the car and lead myself towards the hospital. My legs feeling like jell-o and numb. When we got inside we walked to Samantha's room. When we got in front of her closed hospital room door, I froze, my hand on the handle, refusing to turn it and open it, to reveal Samantha's crippled body. My hand then had enough will to slowly turn the handle, and push open the fake-wood door. I walked in slowly, and regretted it. Samantha laid there on her hospital bed, Emmett, Alice, Rosalie, and Bella surrounded her. Samantha's hair was hanging low to her shoulders. Her crystal blue eyes were sagging, deep purple circles surrounded the bottoms of her pain-filled eyes. I could see her cheek-bones. Her skin sucked in, revealing some of her tiny bones.

I wanted to collapse to the ground, to curl up in a tight ball and die, to never see Samantha in such terrible shape ever again. When Samantha turned her view from Bella to me, she smiled a wide smile. It was weak, but it reached her tender eyes.

"Jasper." She said, her voice weak and hoarse. I walked to her hospital bed, and took her in a soft, gentle long hug.

"Hey Sammy." I whispered. Tears overflowing my eyes.

"Don't cry." She said, pulling away and wiping away a tear that escaped my eye with one of her weak, skinny-boned fingers. "I'm okay." She said. I looked away, knowing that wasn't true.

"Hey Jasper." Emmett said, placing a strong hand on my shoulder. His green blue eyes were saddened, and his black hair stuck up in random places. When he dropped his hand, Rosalie gave me a hug.

"Hi Jasper." She said, her wedding bell voice enhanced the room. Her long frilly, blonde hair was down to her ribs. She was my sister.

"Hello Jazz." Bella said, giving me a hug as soon as Rosalie ended hers. I wasn't sure why everyone was giving me attention, when we should of all been paying attention to Samantha. It made me a little mad. As soon as everyone was done greeting me, I pulled up a chair to the side of Samantha's bed and laid my head on the edge. Samantha wrapped a weak arm around my neck. Then the doctor came in.

"Can I have a minute alone with Samantha?" Doctor Cedrick said. I looked up at his pale self. He wasn't buff, but he wasn't flimsy. He had honey colored whispy hair, and serene blue eyes. I nodded as I got up from next to Samantha, walking out of the room with everyone behind me. I knew I wouldn't leave Samantha, at least not that night.

"Goodnight Samantha." I said to her. Kissing her forehead. It was three days since my first arrival, I hadn't parted with her since. Alice and Edward stayed with me the nights and days at the hospital. Bella, Emmett, and Rosalie all came and visited Samantha in the daytime.

"Goodnight Jasper." She said, giving me another hug. "I love you." She smiled.

"I love you too kiddo. Sleep good." I said getting her favorite stuffed rabbit to her. She cradled it in her arms, and situated herself, before I flipped off the light. I closed her door and sat on one of the hospital chairs next to Alice. I took Alice's hand in mine, and closed my eyes. Edward had gone home that night, and I was happy, I hadn't had alone time with Alice since the forest.

"Goodnight my love." I whispered into Alice's spikey short hair. I breathed in her scent of lavender, lilacs, and vanilla.

"Goodnight." She said, kissing me softly on the cheek. I then closed my eyes, and drifted off to sleep.

It seemed like only a few short hours later that I was being woke up. I came out of a hazy, deep sleep. I saw 5 human figures around me. I rubbed my eyes and saw that it was the doctor, Alice, my mom and dad. My mom and dad both had tears streaming from their eyes, Alice was staring at the ground, sorrow filled her eyes. The doctor looked sad and mourn.

"I'm sorry Jasper, but Samantha has passed away." Dr. Cedrick whispered to me. I refused to believe the doctor's pain stricken words. I didn't believe him. I rubbed my eyes, and bit my tongue, I definitely wasn't dreaming.

"What?" I whispered.

"Samantha has passed away. I am so sorry." The doctor said again. I looked over at my mom and dad, all my mom did was look away and sob some more, my dad tried calming her, although he was heaving big breaths, passed the tears his eyes were producing. My eyes lingered to Alice. She was looking at me, her face crinkled in pain. She nodded, and a single tear escaped her right eye. I started rapidly shaking my head. Tears started forming from my eyes, and falling over my lids. I couldn't believe what was going on.

My head was spinning, I felt light-headed and dizzy. Were the painful words they were saying true? There was only one way I could find out. I got up from the chair and stumbled towards Samantha's hospital door. My legs were weak. My hand and whole arm shook as I twisted open the door, and heaved the door open. There laid Samantha on her bed. Blanket over her, rabbit in-between her left arm and the left side of her body. Her eyes were closed, she didn't look present, she looked like she was…gone, not in reality. I then thrashed to the floor. Heaving breaths in and out, tears clogging my throat, blurring my vision. Samantha was gone, the cancer took its course, and took her life with it.

I couldn't speak, my throat was plugged up. My heart felt ripped in a million pieces. I felt my whole body numb over with a cold, lonely, loss, feeling. My mind buzzed, and my heart thrummed in my ear. My breaths were loud and heavy. My head was laid on the floor. I was in a ball on my side. My eyes were darting around the ground. I smacked the ground, over, and over, trying to see if it would help. But nothing took away the heavy pain that was fleeting through my body, overpowering my vision, my hearing, my breathing, until everything went black.


	3. Chapter 3

I woke up in a dark room. I rubbed my eyes, and they were moist. My mind quickly flashed over why my eyes would be wet. Samantha. My stomach quickly tightened, and my throat clenched. I closed my eyes hard, and wanted to go back to the dark, black place, that I was before awakening. I then noticed the bed I was in. It definitely wasn't my bed. It was a dark purple, I was in Alice's room. I turned on her bedside light and saw her midnight-blue walls. They had posters of her favorite bands. One poster was just a plain neon green poster. I saw her t.v, I saw her long armoire mirror, and her huge walk-in closet. I then looked over at her tall book-case filled with books that were so old, to books that were from the new millennia. I then saw pink furry pens, and a wide variety of makeup and colorful nail polishes.

Then, Alice danced into the room. Her flowy walk looked like it would be part of a high-class foreign fashion show. Her short hair was her styled in her usual spikey look. Her usual brown eyes were tired, and black. Almost a deep purple. Her eyes did that when she was mad, upset, sad, or she was thirsty. Fallen angels, every once and a while, had to drink from this one waterfall type thing, that was hidden in a dream like place. The waterfall's liquid, engaged us, and made us stronger.

"Go Alice." I told her. She knew what I would mean.

"I can't leave you right now." She shook her head, sitting on the edge of her bed, next to me.

"It is okay. Emmett or Edward are here. I can spend some quality manly time with them." I chuckled.

"This is a time for no jokes." She said in a serious time. Then, she cracked a tiny smile.

"Really, I will be okay. You need to drink." I ushered her. She was sometimes as stubborn as Bella was.

"Fine," She said. "but, as soon as I am done, I will be back with you." She said, getting up from the bed and taking my hand.

"Take as long as you need Alice." I smiled, kissing her hand. She then nodded, and soon she was gone. Emmett then walked in to the room. _No privacy. _I thought to myself. I loved my brothers, blood brothers or not, but I wanted to be alone.

"Hey, I just wanted to come check on you." Emmett said, his muscular figure standing in the middle of Alice's room.

"I am fine…I think." I said.

"I am so sorry about what happened Jasper." He said, looking at the ground.

"Thank you Emmett. It means a lot." I nodded.

"Well, I am going to leave. Holler if you need me." He said, turning around.

"Thanks." As soon as Emmett was out of view, and hearing, I closed my eyes. I couldn't fall back to sleep. My mind was awake. My heart was so pained, my insides were gone, my soul was burning away, or so it felt. My mind was overpowered by a black force, that brought manipulating pain that started to spread in my veins, flowing through my blood system, reproducing, pumping out of my heart, spreading out, and filling any empty space it could find, until the pain was the only thing I could feel. I wanted to have Samantha in my arms. Her warm, little fragile body, small and soft. I could almost smell her hair, her special scent that she had. I could see her perfectly in my mind.

She was gone, and I could do nothing. I wish I could make her come back to life, to not have cancer, to be healthy and happy, away from the hurting pain that the cancer was causing her crippled body. Tears started to form, its salty liquid escaping from my tear ducts. Slipping out my eyes and making their way in a path down my cheeks, my neck, then soaking through my shirt. I wanted to die then, to see Samantha in heaven. I knew that was impossible though, the only place fallen angels went when they died was a place called, Quantim. It was where the fallen angel's souls went. The only place they could go. The only way a fallen angel could die, was to be murdered, we were immortals.

I then got up from Alice's bed, and took out my wallet that was still in my back, pants pocket. I got out the razor that I always kept there. I shut Alice's door and locked it. I put my back against the door, and slid down. I put the razor against my wrist, after unwrapping the bandanna. The razor was under the two cuts, I would make a third one. I then pushed down on the razor, and slid it across my wrist. It made one, long, precise slice. Blood starting gushing its way out of the opened wound. I licked the trickle of blood that started to flow down my arm. It tasted rusty, and not its normal sweetness. I then smiled as the pain of Samantha's death started to ease up the slightest. The same pain started seeping through Alice's empty bedroom's air.

I then bundled up the wounds in the same bandana and sprit zed one of Alice's perfumes throughout the room. Why wasn't I in my own room?

"Edward!?" I called. Seconds later after opening Alice's door, Edward appeared.

"Yes?" He asked. A concerned look on his face.

"Why aren't I at my house? In my bed? Why was I in Alice's bed? Why am I in Alice's room?" I sped through the questions.

"Oh." Edward said, his gaze riveting from me to the ground.

"The answer would be?" I asked, staring at his face. It looked like he was about to say some thing that he didn't want to.

"Your parents left." Edward whispered.

"What?" I asked in disbelief.

"They left state. We told them that we would take you in. They took Samantha with them, to have her funeral." He said, shaking his head.

"What?" I asked again. This time, Edward looked up at me. His face was saddened, all he did was nod. The exact same thing that Alice had did at the hospital.

"I'm sorry Jas-"

"Why wouldn't they take me?" I asked astonished. I was their _son. _

"They thought it would be too much for you." Edward said in a flat tone.

"But it isn't too much for them!?" I hollered. Edward flinched at the volume of my voice. "They acted worse than me at Samantha's death!"

"I don't understand either Jasper. I am very sorry." Edward whispered.

"I don't understand. Why wouldn't they take me to my own sister's _funeral?_"

"I don't-"

"I-I-I can't believe this." I said looking up at Edward. "I need to leave." I said, shaking my head. I shoved Edward out of my way. I walked down the stairs. Emmett, Rosalie, and Bella all turned their view away from the television and looked at me, as I was headed towards the door. Their eyes were wide, probably at my murderous expression. My hands were clenched in fists. Before opening the front door, I smashed a hole through the wall. My wings spread open, heavy, black wings. I ignored them and ran to my car. As soon as I was safe inside of it, I drove to wherever my eyes saw road. I pulled over to the shoulder of the road as soon as I couldn't see anymore. My tears had blurred my vision too badly. When I was stopped, I laid out on the car seat and started yelling.

I started to bang my left fist on the car-seat, over and over. Yelling as loud as I could, screaming my throat out, ignoring the tears that dared to spill over my eyes. My head started to pound, I was beginning to get a head-ache from my yelling, but I didn't stop. It was the only way to get the depression I had out of me. My legs started to kick, and I started to punch anything. My legs were kicking my door and everything my feet could touch. I blasted a scream-o song out of the speakers, not caring how loud it was. I wanted it loud enough to drown out my thoughts, and my thoughts of Samantha. I couldn't hear her name anymore.

There was a tap on my window. I stopped yelling, and looked up. It was Alice. I turned down the radio, and unlocked the door. She slid in and took me in her arms. She didn't say anything and I was happy. She laid her cheek on the top of my head and stroked my cheek. Silent tears started to form, I started breathing heavy, trying to even out my breath. It seemed impossible at that point.

"It is okay Jasper." Alice whispered. I just tightened my grip around her waist and closed my eyes. I knew that nothing was okay, everything was bad, nothing was going good, everything was one dull black hill that I couldn't climb over. Alice continued to stroke my cheek, her cool touch started to calm me only the slightest. My closed eyes led my body in to a sleep, and I was so happy.


End file.
